What is FGW? Go back to the shadows, I mean Go Back To Week 1.
TL:DR; – FGW is the likely number of Head-to-Head fantasy football matchups a player has won his team. dFGW is FGW adjusted for ADP.
‘Twas the day before Christmas, when throughout the playoffs,
Fantasy Man’gers were handing out layoffs.
While players were drafted to fill teams with care,
By now in December, less vic’tries were there.
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of workhorse backs danced in their heads.
And mamma in her ‘kerchief, and I without clothes,
Checked for the scores I’ve now learned to loathe.
Who Won The Week?
In the Blue Tent at MetLife there arose such a clatter,
I clicked a yellow icon to see what was the matter.
The shoulder of Jalen had earned him his namesake,
His fantasy owners to follow with brain ache.
A performance repeated from Mr. Irrelevant,
Caused Niners investors to be extra celebrant,
But raucous applause, I tried to rebuke,
It wasn’t for all – I had started Aiyuk,
It was then that I realized I could avoid failure,
With one final team that survived my Jon Taylor.
This roster was clean of all Browns and of Texans,
And to them I gave my explicit directions:
“Now, FIELDS! now, KEENAN! now, BARKLEY and BAM!
On, KITTLE! on WATSON! on, DEVONTA and CAM!
To the top of the league! with no more help from Foreman!
You must win, my real team was sunk by a Mormon!”
Leaderboard Updates
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,
So up to the league-top the QBs they flew,
Next year we will draft all their kin in round two.
While many have found Mr. Jacobs is great,
They later will fall for dead zone RB bait.
But I’ll put a reminder for those taking notes,
That Jefferson’s ceiling is healthy Kupp’s moat.
We learned if you picked Chiefs with extra last names,
True value passed by you like runaway trains.
If next year you’re looking for more secret picks,
Don’t take it from me – I twice took Kyle Pitts.
His eyes — how they twinkled! his measurables how merry!
What was I to do, of a freak be more wary?
The one pick I dodged, and it save my team’s life,
Was the senior QB who’s divorcing his wife.
If you took ol’ DJ, it’s never again,
But at least your team’s music was rainin’ like men;
Maybe he wouldn’t have been your team’s breaker,
Receiving his passes from anyone but Baker.
Good QBs help wideouts, unless their name’s Gabe,
In which case, I’d rather have broccoli rabe,
For all Christmas dinner than pick that poor guy;
Should’ve kept the name Gabriel and watched the stats fly.
Byron-Cobalt.com Exclusives
The Full List
Here we are, another year nearing its end,
And what I say next doesn’t mean to offend:
This game we play’s crazy, has no rhyme or reason,
And seems to get weirder with each passing season.
But that’s the whole point! It wouldn’t be fun,
If we ended each time saying “everyone’s won!”.
So whether you’re done or you’re still in the fight,
HAPPY SATURDAY FOOTBALL! -AND GODDAMMIT, BAM KNIGHT.
Quick aside: I was on a podcast this week! Check out FSM Fantasy for a deeper recap of Week 15 and a lookahead to Week 16:
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Byron Cobalt's Lazy Analysis 